Friday, February 24, 2006

Well, the beast of the wild will be led by a little child, and I'll be changed from this creature that I am...

Well the cardiovascular doc Dr. Ellison, just came in and let us know that they found a few things that they want to look in to. His red blood cell count is down and his platelette count is down. They are going to bring in a Hematologist for a consult, to see if there is anything they can do to get those up a bit. The hope is that will make him feel better. He said that this is a very big strain on his heart. He told dad that if everything continues to go okay, he will probably go home on Monday. Dad has been so pitiful today. I think that Dr. Ellison saw that today too.

I just feel exhausted. I can't really focus on anything and at the same time my mind is on everything. It is a little overwhelming really. I am trying to make sure I get all of my school work done correctly and on time. I am trying to study during the day at the hospital and then do the stuff I have to do on the computer when I get home. I am online at the hospital now, but the tests I have to do when I won't be interrupted. In talking to HM, I feel guilty a bit cause I can't really spend time with him like I would like to. He is very understanding, but I am very solitary in some of this. It is the only way I know to deal with it all. I can't afford to give in to letting someone else take care of me. I have to hold it together for my dad, for my family. It's hard to explain really.

My sister is really doing pretty good with all of this, I know she is sad, but so are we all.


Joan said...

Your Dad is lucky to have you. Dr. E. is great and will take good care of him.

CharlestonGirl said...

Thanks sweetie! Dr. E has been through a lot with us in the last 12 years. He is awesome. I love him. Thanks again for the kind words.